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Ehhh i'm back at school
Most of my classes are cool. My teachers are all nuts, but thats how i like it. | | |
| 24 is an obsession
season 6 starts on the 14th
now some funnies
After Season 6 of 24, the Chinese will be on the Endangered Species List.
Jack Bauer never retreats, he just attacks in the opposite direction.
When a convicted terrorist was sentenced to face Jack Bauer, he appealed to have the sentence reduced to death.
When bad things happen to good people, its probably fate. When bad things happen to bad people, it’s probably Jack Bauer.
The city of Los Angeles once named a street after Jack Bauer in gratitude for his saving the city several times. They had to rename it after people kept dying when they tried to cross the street. No one crosses Jack Bauer and lives.
Jack once shot himeself 10 times, just to prove 50 cent is a bitch. He proceeded to wrestle and aligator while talking to Chloe about schematics.
When Jack Bauer ran out of ammo, he caught 3 bullets in his chest and used them to reload.
Jack Bauer doesn't need to eat, sleep, or use the bathroom because his organs are afraid of making him angry.
Life doesn't give Jack Bauer lemons. Life asks him which fruit he wants.
If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice.
If everyone on "24" followed Jack Bauer's instructions, it would be called "12".
...and on the seventh day Jack Bauer said, "I'll take it from here."
Jack Bauers calender goes from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Jack Bauer.
The state of California plans to reduce violent crime by changing the method of capital punishment from lethal injection to Jack Bauer.
There have been no terrorist attacks in United States since Jack Bauer has appeared on television.
No matter how or when you die, the last thing you see will be Jack Bauer.
If Jack Bauer gives you his word, return it immediately and run.
Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.
Upon hearing that he was played by Kiefer Sutherland, Jack Bauer killed Sutherland. Jack Bauer gets played by no man.
The Berlin Wall fell because Jack Bauer needed to get to the other side.
When 24 airs on the Spanish channel everyones lines are translated except for Jack's. The reason for this, nobody speaks for Jack Bauer.
My husband doesn't wish he was Jack Bauer. He wishes I was Jack Bauer.
Jack Bauer does not get taken prisoner. He puts himself in a disadvantageous position so as to make his next several killings more dramatic.
MTV once tried to 'Punk' Kiefer Sutherland by staging a robery in a store. Sutherland smiled and pulled out his SIG and shot 3 actors in the head. This is why there was a new cast on Punk'd after season one.
Jack Bauer is the only human in the world with the ability to make Chloe O'Brien drop the personality disorder and patch him through.
Jack Bauer let himself be drugged, beaten and captured inside a crate on a Chinese ship heading out of the USA with no way for help to find him. Now he has them right where we wants them.
When Christopher Henderson tried to shoot Jack, his gun was, in fact, loaded. The bullets were just too scared to come out.
1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
When Kim Bauer lost her virginity, Jack Bauer found it and put it back.
Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.
If you wake up in the morning, it's because Jack Bauer spared your life.
If it tastes like chicken, looks like chicken, and feels like chicken, but Jack Bauer says its beef. Then it's fucking beef.
Most pilots need 5,000 feet of runway to land a plane. Jack Bauer needs 100 feet and a gun.
The only reason the Chinese kept Jack alive is so that he could bring down the population.
Jack Bauer doesn't have a firewall on his PC. He has a Bauerwall. It's basically just a JPEG of Jack Bauer. No virus has ever attacked Jack Bauer's PC. Ever.
If Jack Bauer's gun jams, it's because he wanted to beat you with it.
Get one thing straight, the only reason that container ship is still afloat is that Jack Bauer doesn't feel like swimming all the way to China.
Lets get one thing straight, the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you.
Jack Bauer could strangle you with a cordless phone.
Jack Bauer heard the Michael Jackson song "beat it," and Jack Bauer beat the black out of him. Thus began Michael Jackson's downward spiral.
Going to China is all part of Jack Bauer's master plan to rid the world of Communism.
It's no use crying over spilt milk... Unless that was Jack Bauer's milk. Then you are so screwed.
Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves.
On a high school math test, Jack Bauer put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Jack Bauer solves all his problems with Violence.
Jack doesn't believe in Murphy's Law, only Bauer's Law: "Whatever CAN go wrong, WILL be resolved in a period of 24 hours."
When someone asks him how his day is going, Jack replies, "Previously, on 24..."
American Idol is only popular because it has a commercial for 24.
Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer.
Jack Bauer is the leading cause of death in Middle Eastern men.
In order to control illegal immigration in the United States, the president installed cardboard cutouts of Jack Bauer along the US/Mexico border.
Jack needed a well-earned holiday after season 5. Drugged, captured, beaten and tortured in a cargo hold surrounded by Chinese agents eager for revenge is just his preferred method of travel - otherwise he tends to get bored on long trips.
Superman's only weakness is Kryptonite. Jack Bauer laughs at Superman for having a weakness.
Tony was once shot in the neck, rushed to the hospital, underwent emergency surgery and was back on the job in just a few hours. Jack Bauer still can't believe that pussy went to the hospital first.
There is the right way, the wrong way, and the Jack Bauer way. It's basically the right way but faster and more deaths.
Kim Bauer was an accident. Not even the pill can stop Jack Bauer.
In 96 hours, Jack Bauer has killed 93 people and saved the world 4 times. What the fuck have you done with your life?
Jack Bauer doesn't speak any foreign languages, but he can make any foreigner speak English in a matter of minutes.
Jack Bauer arm once wrestled Superman. The stipulations were the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside of his pants.
If Rosa Parks was in Jack Bauer's seat, she'd move to the back of the bus.
When Jack Bauer goes to the airport and the metal detector doesn't go off, security gives him a gun.
Sun Tzu once wrote, "If your enemy is weaker, conquer him. If he is stronger, join him. If he is Jack Bauer, you're fucking dead."
Jack Bauer teaches a course at Harvard entitled: "Time Management: Making the Most Out Of Each Day."
Messenger bags owe Jack Bauer for single-handedly stealing them from the clutches of emo fashion and making them genuinely cool. Same thing with hoodies. And crying.
Jack Bauer wasn't born, he was unleashed.
Jack Bauer doesn't take fingerprints, he takes fingers.
Jack Bauer once killed so many terrorists that at one point, the #5 CIA Most Wanted fugitive was an 18-year-old teenager in Malaysia who downloaded the movie Dodgeball.
Jack Bauer's favorite color is severe terror alert red. His second favorite color is violet, but just because it sounds like violent.
Jack Bauer has never caught a cold. How do we know? Colds still exist.
Simon Says should be renamed to Jack Bauer Says because if Jack Bauer says something
When Jack Bauer took a stress test, the test failed.
In the 18 months where Jack Bauer was presumed dead, Tony Almeida was put in a coma, Michelle and David Palmer were killed, a major hurricane raveged the Gulf Coast, and Rob Schneider made another movie. See what happens when Bauer isn't around?
Jack Bauer went out to the desert, and was bitten by a rattlesnake. The snake died.
In high school Jack Bauer was voted "Most Likely to Kill the Foreign Kid"... and "Best Eyes
Jack Bauer brought sexy back, then shot Justin Timberlake for trying to take the credit.
Don't beg Jack Bauer to shoot you. He will simply shoot your wife. No man tells Jack Bauer what to do. | | |
| xtuffx
august burns red is tough
christmas is coming soon
i got 90$ for my books....thats sweet i guess
i'm excited for this guy
to get back on the 21 so we can enjoy some great wall...just like the old days
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yeah! cartoon version of myself
ps i havent shaved in a while, and last thursday was the only night that i've gone to bed befoer 5am | | |
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People keep telling me to give up xanga.
Well i'm not because one day everyone is going to have a xanga again, and i wont have to make a new name i still have my good ol' one from 9th grade
I'm still going strong
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